{just a couple of things}

it seems i've had so many ideas racing through my mind, i feel the need to straighten them out. first, i notice in the mornings that i tend to not want to go to work. it's an annoying sense of "i've got better things to do" the last few mornings i have felt this, i noticed my attitude throughout the day is more negative, more just wanting to get the whole thing over with.
in truth, i do like my job.

i teach children how to read.
maybe i force children to read.....the line is blurred. nevertheless, i work with the most beautiful little beings in the city. their faces, their endless energy, the way they run and jump onto a sled. they are inner-city kids however, and most are fairly jaded in their young lives. but, they're funny and i like that. so, it's not the kids i dread seeing, it's that i must go to work. the words themselves are foreboding. so an attitude change is clearly needed.

next, i've been doing yoga for last year. it began as a form of exercise, to help me with climbing, and get some strength. i have the most amazing yoga teacher, and her practice is lovely, so i began to try to yoga like she yogas. we don't practice in front of mirrors, i have no idea what i look like. but, i keep this sense of trying, of having goals (handstand why must you mock me) and then i saw the most amazing yoga video ever. the woman was gorgeous and serene and pressing into handstands from all over the place. it gave me a sense of what my practice should be. a practice. (novel, i've mentioned before i'm slow, right?)
i need to breath, calm my mind, listen to my heart, and eventually the lightness will happen from within. i will take this concept to the rest of my life.

lightness.
calm.
breath.

also, i will only go to yoga classes that give me that.....some are like a football field all competitive and show-offy.

i may also try my hand at painting....
i'm not artistic, but, i would like some art...we'll see how that goes.

i think an appreciation for what i am, for my body, for my mind, and for my life will translate over into the day. maybe if i slow down, i may even get more accomplished.