know those days, the ones where simply surviving seems to take every ounce of will?
i've had a week like that.
a week of just barely making it.

i haven't cried.
i want to.
but, i've managed to keep myself composed. i know, if the world senses i'm falling apart, it will push me, just that little bit, and over the edge i will tumble.

i've been yelling, alot, recently. not out of anger, but simply to be heard. i try to not yell, and instead project my voice, have it rise above the chaos. projecting is difficult, and i'm reduced to yelling.
and hiding.
yes, hiding, in dark rooms, behind curtains, around corners, in hope of getting a solitary moment.
just one.
to recompose.

i am lucky, i have people rally around me. help me, offer their strength, and arms in which to fall.
i've needed it, like air and water and cupcakes.

a week.

it is now friday.
it is almost over.

this weekend i will lose myself in the woods.
get far from the noise.
and climb